I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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