i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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