Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Randomize
