when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize