you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
