Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
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