Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
