I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
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