my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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