I hope mine doesn't look like that
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
