but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
