I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
i barfeds in our rink
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
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