There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Sponge bath it is.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
it wasn't lemon gatorade
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Randomize
