if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize