I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
