Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize