I am full of burrito and curiosity
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
