She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
