i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
