At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
