What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
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