is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
