that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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