my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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