Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Two words: nipple clamps
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