One girl and one boy is just not enough.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
he was CRYING into my vagina
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
