if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize