butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
my liver is dry heaving
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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