as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
