Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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