dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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