Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
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