Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Slut skills are useful in every country.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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