she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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