she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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