I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
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