I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
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