Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
...so i touched it.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
