Pants 0. Shit 1.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
I'm too high and old for this...
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
