I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
