We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Let's get the cat blown out
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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