shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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