she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize