I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
