If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
