I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Randomize