Small penises have feelings too.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
