Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
