In the future we'll all be gay
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Randomize
