Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
