wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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