God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
