I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize